The Monkey God

The Dome in Rome

2011-10-17T19:29:00.004+01:00

Popped into Popetown and had a look at the remodelled marble which used to adorn The Amphitheatre of Vespasian, (Look it up).
A lot of the treasures now in the Vatican Museum and St Peters were stripped from the Roman buldings and I can't help thinking it would be nice to put some of it back.

Anyway, this is the outside of St Peters.

And this is the inside.

Nice don't you think?

Photo for today

2011-10-10T19:06:00.005+01:00

I was in Rome for a few days in February 2010 for the Six-Nations rugby match between Engalnd and Italy.
It was my first time over there and it will not be my last.
The City was incredible and for someone who appreciates history and architecture it is not to be missed.
Beer is a bit pricey but worth it and the food in the small restaurants is wonderful.

I did take one or two photos while I was there, or maybe 230 ish in three days but I only got to see a small part of the City.
I did the usual tourist bits with a view to catch up next visit when I hope to have much more time.

I'm sure that in today's Rome, if the builders had some plaster left over they would take it back to the Roman equivalent of B&Q but back then they went a bit mad and decided to make a water feature.

There is an ice cream shop just behind where I took this and it was really nice to sit next to the Fontana Di Trevi in the sun, in February, eating ice cream.

Rome.

Go there.

The Last Post

2011-10-07T16:21:00.003+01:00

How things change eh?

I was looking at this old blog the other day and thought it may be time I had another stab at venting my spleen and any other appropriate organs on you unsuspecting visitors.

I can't do the "daily blog" thing as I also have something approaching a life and a very busy job but I will post photos and whatever else comes to mind when the juices are uncorked.

My last entry way back was of my old beloved Gretsch kit but as some of you may know from Dive's posts, this is the one which replaced it.

So now I have remembered how to work this blog I'll try to post some old drivel as often as I can.

I are been mostly ...........

2008-09-12T20:24:00.006+01:00

Blimey, it's been a while since I was here.

Not had the time or inclination to blog for ages but couldn't resist a piccie of my stress relief system.
I've had this for a couple of months now and get the chance to set up in a mates rehearsal rooms on a Friday afternoon for an hour or so.
It's bloody hard work compared to my Roland electronic kit but it makes me smile.

Lots going on as usual but I'm sure Dive will post the 60th Anniversary celebrations we are having at work this weekend, then it's off to Goodwood for The Revival next weekend.

Got some nice shots from the 3rd Test match at Edgbaston against South Africa as well, so will try to get those up at some point, (there was a streaker) !!!

Oh and Tiger, if you are out there, I'll drop you a line soon.

Barnes & Barnes - A tribute.

2008-06-23T20:34:00.002+01:00

Nipped over to Belgium for a few days last week and snapped a few pictures to kick off some regular posts for Project Blue.
I thought Blue Monday would sound good but that will have to wait because I found this....

Why would anyone build several small water fountains from lobster claws and fish heads unless it was a tribute to the stupendously wonderful Barnes and Barnes song "Fish Heads"

Stick with it....

Blue too

2008-06-15T10:47:00.003+01:00

I'm off to Belgium again at 03:00 in the morning (yeah)!
So to tide things over until I get back, here are a couple of "Project Blue" efforts from yesterday morning in the city.

I'm not too sure what was going on in the ladies loo at the car park, could it be a giant insect zapping machine or a "tan while you pee" system?

Off to pack and get an early night.

Blue Moon

2008-06-09T20:18:00.004+01:00

Vic has Project Blue going on over at her place at the moment and I thought I would have a go myself.
I took this yesterday from the garden as it was the first bit of blue I had seen in a while and I even managed to get the moon in there.
(5 points if you can spot it)

If this goes badly and I can't find much blue I may have to post a picture of Albert Collins.
We shall see.

Bite size

2008-06-06T20:38:00.004+01:00

These little morsels were hatched in a raised flower bed outside the paint shop at work.

Recipie suggestions please?

I think crispy duck as a starter with bite size kebabs to follow.
I didn't mean it Lynn, they now live on the pond at the front of the factory with all the others and are getting very well fed.
(Foie gras perhaps)?

How did we do ?

2008-06-04T19:49:00.003+01:00

Lynn wanted to see if we could post about similar stuff again today so, as great minds think alike.............

Drums

Beer

Work

I don't have any decent shots of rugby at the moment but thats one of the other things I have a passion for.
Oh, and weemen.

So Lynn, how did we do?

Up Close and Personal

2008-06-02T19:59:00.007+01:00

I couldn't believe it when I nipped over to Lynn's site this evening and found that she had taken some pictures of the poppies in her garden.
I took a few shots at Mum's on Sunday and some from my garden on Saturday, which proves that great minds think alike.

I thought it might be a good chance to try out the macro capability of my camera, so here are some garden flowers which may be overlooked by most.

Moss needs flowers too.

Thyme flowers are nice in a salad but clear out the spiders first.

This is the pot that the thyme is in.

Complete with lichen flowers.

I think the macro works just fine.

The "G" Spot

2008-05-26T13:20:00.008+01:00

I finally took the plunge on Saturday and got a Canon G9 camera after months of indecision.
It made sense to go for a smaller camera rather than a DSLR and by the time I'm ready for one of those, they will be much cheaper. In the meantime, if I need a bigger camera, I can use my old Nikon 35mm and good old fashioned film.

So, with the English weather doing it's usual bank holiday thing, blowing a hoolie and pissing down with rain, I'm left to have a practice in the house and garden to see how this thing works.

My coffee table holds the key to my soul.
Drum books, rugby books and how to drink wine.

This is for Dive and is simply titled.... Wood! (f'nar f'nar)

The only one of my pictures that I still have.
It is hanging straight but I wasn't.

Hello Iris, it was sunny on Saturday.

These two have some young which they are teaching to swim in the stream which runs into my pond. (It's not a real stream, but one which circulates via pumps filters and lots of tubes).

This is Bob

And this is one of his ancestors.

Lets hope next weekend is a bit better and I can get out to take some decent stuff.

Commercial Break

2008-05-20T19:09:00.004+01:00

And now a word from our sponsors;

Advertising was much better in the '50's & '60's when bare faced lies were perfectly acceptable and nobody questioned anything.

For anyone not familiar with "Oxo", it's a dried beef stock cube used to flavour gravy for your Sunday roast.
Not too sure why you would put it in milk and give it to your little wretches.
Might be worth a try for the hell of it, tell them it's chocolate milk and wait for the reaction!!!

MMMMMMmmmmmmm beefy refreshment.

Scare wear

2008-05-14T20:04:00.004+01:00

Now I have dug out some of my travel photos and worked out how to get them here, I will post some more over the next few weeks.

Inspired by Lynn, Mme and Dive, here's my contribution to the swimwear collection.
This is me just before entering the "Fat Bastard of the Day" contest in Cuba.
As you can see, when I got to the beach, everyone else fucked off!!!

When in Cuba one must read Hemingway.

Just so you know what the food was like, welcome to the Restaurant Colon.

More Phlegm

2008-04-30T10:45:00.009+01:00

As I've let Lynn down so very badly by being a bit tardy with my posts, this is just for her.
Don't eat them all at once and if you do make it to Norwich, I still have some of these left.

So, I've been with the Phlegms again. (yeah)!!!
This is part of the new border controls at the Channel Tunnel.
If you give it some food you can go through.
This gull was one of the extras in "The Birds". It's sad how they are now reduced to scratching out a living by menacing tourists with their "Hooded" look.

This is where I play when I'm over in Belgium, complete with a pretend series 1 Elise.
This is just a load of old panels we used for testing, which were then screwed together on a few blocks of wood and painted in "Gay hairdresser purple".

Here we are in jolly Mechelen again.
This is for Dive. See how the Belgian town planners seamlessly blend the new architecture with the old?

I like bridges, so here is a bridge.

Obviously I work very hard when I'm there but there are benefits.
Belgian beer and chilli nuts at the end of a long day.

I have been going to Belgium for over 10 years now with work and when we go out in the evenings the restaurant food is very good where ever we go. This, however, was probably the best place I've been for the setting as well as the food.
It's Het Pomphuis (The Pump House) alongside the river at the docks in Antwerp.
The building has an eclectic style with art nouveau features and beautiful tall Romanesque windows set in red brick edged with block stonework.
The inside, as you can see, is the old pumping gear used to drain the nearby dry dock to maintain the ships which used to trade from Antwerp.

I had a superb seat just to the left of the three chairs to the top right of the picture.
It was right on the edge and ideal for vertigo sufferers.
The food was excellent so if anyone is ever in Antwerp, go there.

On my travels.

2008-04-11T14:08:00.001+01:00

I will be away from Blogland next week so play nicely together and don't run indoors.

It's Curry Club tonight, Twickenham for the EDF Cup Final between Leicester Tigers and The Ospreys on Saturday, ( I'll wave Lynn), and off to the land of the Phlegms again on Monday.

I will try to get some photos etc and try to put the fun back into Belgium.
(I be glum).

Lynns Mystery

2008-04-05T13:43:00.003+01:00

Lynn posted a picture of some strange growths in a tree and wondered what they were.

This is a shot I took a few weeks ago as I travelled to Pouancé in France.

Seems they are taking over the world.
Maybe they are alien nests!
Maybe thats where Twiglets come from.
(that would explain the crappy taste).

Happy Easter

2008-03-23T10:30:00.007Z

Just a few pictures taken this morning as I came home.

The date today is March 23rd

Easter Sunday

Oh well, the garden won't get done today.

Happy Easter to you all from festive Norfolk.

Wheeeee !!!

2008-03-13T19:10:00.002Z

I have been in a blog vacuum for a while but as Dive said he was going to show some scary views, I thought I would mention the view from the plane I was in this week.
I have been over to France with work Monday to Wednesday for the last couple of weeks and this Monday we trundled to Stansted with joy in our hearts safe in the knowledge that our flight would be cancelled due to the storms etc.
So as we flew across the channel in our "not so cancelled" 737, the pilot informed us that the crosswinds at Dinard airport were "on the limits for this aircraft but we will attempt to land anyway".

Thanks matie.

As we came out of the clouds it started to get a bit bumpy, but I have been on lots of bumpy flights and this wasn't so bad.
Then it got more bumpy and, as we approached the runway, we went up diddly up up, and down diddly down down, and then sideways for a bit, then the right hand wing flipped up about 10 degrees and we went sideways and down again. By this time we were about 50 feet off the runway and having fun when the pilot must have thought "fuck this for a game of soldiers" and put on full throttle and we went up diddly up up at a rate of knots.
When we got to about 20,000 feet the tannoy calmly announced " you may have noticed that we had to abort that landing as I deemed it a little dangerous" No shit Sherlock!!

We then flew on to Brest where the gale force winds were blowing directly down the runway rather than across it.
The pilot got us in first time, although it was bloody rough. The end of the much shorter runway at Brest was very close when we finally slowed enough to turn back to the terminal. (that's not a good word for an airport building).
As we filed off the plane, the pilot stood at the cockpit door with a smile on his face. I said "That was interesting" and his reply was a silent intake of breath and raised eyebrows as if to say "thank fuck I got that down in one piece".

He earned every penny of his wage on Monday, thanks Captain.

New Years Eve

2008-01-11T12:51:00.001Z

I know it's late but there you go.

These are some of the usual suspects for New Years Eve.
I knew I should have grown a beard and tash instead of trying to stick one on.

Take the above and add lots of these below and similar libation, shake well and release into Bungay for a bloody good night out.
Tequilla slammers with lemon is not the norm but this is Norfolk and the pub didn't have any limes!

This, as I am reliably informed, is Venom. The evil incarnation of Spiderman.
It's actually the drunk incarnation of Eddie.
(He said they were his muscles but we were not so sure)

This is "mutual leaning", a clever manoeuvre to make sure we don't all fall in a heap.

The bloke on the left of the picture below is the senior lecturer in engineering at a local college.
He usually only wears those things on a weekend.

We always have a good laugh and everyone else seems to respond to a bunch of idiots in fancy dress, no matter which pub we go to.
There were fewer people out this year than in past years which was a shame but maybe the smoking ban has something to do with that.
Roll on next year.

Up the river

2007-12-30T09:41:00.001Z

This years Christmas river trip was a subdued affair as most of the usual suspects were absent for one reason or another.
We carried on regardless and it became five drunks in a boat.

Just around the first bend in the river is a nice view of Beccles church. This is quite unusual as the tower has been built separately from the church and only has clocks on three sides. The side facing the river doesn't have a clock as the land was considered unusable for anything other than growing marshes and damp things so why put a clock on it.

I though I would join Dive on the wobbly water pics crusade.
The sun was just over the yard arm but looked remarkably low in the sky considering it was only 12:30.

This is what Norfolk looks like.

This is just for Vic.
I saw this and thought of you.

We tried to get some comment from these two but as they were mute swans they just did some contemporary mime and then fucked off.
They did make some more wobbly water.

This is the final destination, The Wherry at Geldeston.
Log fires, good beer and a dartboard, just what we needed.

It was a good trip and we didn't need to break any ice on the river which has happened in the past. We always make the trip whatever the elements throw at us.
Roll on next year.

Yo Ho Ho.........

2007-12-24T16:41:00.000Z

That's my contribution to the festivities out of the way.

I'm off down the river on Boxing day and it's into the City on Saturday for a lunchtime session round the pubs and it all ends up on New Years Eve with our fancy dress pub crawl around Bungay so I should have something to post.

Merry Xmas to you all and Yo Ho Ho Blah de fucking blah...............etc.

Gone to the dogs

2007-12-14T15:50:00.000Z

Life is always interesting in the magic kingdom and to keep our spirits up, a few of us formed The Curry Club.

It consists of Mikey, who is the supervisor for composite and body manufacture, (glueing & sticking), little old me with my mini empire in process engineering and paint, (colouring in) and five of my process guy's.

Every 5-6 weeks we all get the train into the City from our various starting points at around 18:30 and meet up for a few beers.
We then move on to a curry house for several courses of anything that takes our fancy, washed down with a few more beers, then we wander back to the station with the occasional stop for a few beers and get the last train home around 10:15.

All harmless fun and it makes a big difference at work too.

We thought we should have a change this Christmas so we booked for a night of greyhound racing at Gt Yarmouth Stadium.

Greyhounds are not the only dogs you find in Gt Yarmouth as I know from gigging there with Big Bro for many years. These ones were o.k. though.

We just booked for a normal race night but we got ourselves included in the Christmas party season so we all ordered big steaks and got turkey with all the trimmings as a bonus extra meal. Sirloin with turkey, Brussels sprouts and roasties is an interesting combination but what the hell, we'd had a few by then.

This fine figure of a man is my graduate, "Honest Phil".
He has a degree in mathmatics and statistics and has just got his first real girlfriend who he met at church group. I think Fresh needs to give him the St Patricks Day treatment to clear the cobwebs for the lad.
We had a bunch of draw tickets and he won a festive bear for his true love.

We were merciless with Honest Phil and his little bear.

As the evening wore on we got into the racing.
We had a waitress for our food and beer and a tote girl to take our bets and our lewd drunken suggestions as to why she should come home with us.

I don't have too much of a clue when it comes to betting and odds and the like but we all bunged a tenner into the pot and also made our own bets depending on how strange the dogs name was or which one had a crap before the race etc.

This was what I got from a £2.00 reverse bet on 1st & 2nd. £120 ish plus change. Not bad considering I didn't have a clue what I was doing.

I think I won around £200.00 for the night and the Curry Club cleared around £500 so it was a pretty good night. I ended the night with around £100 more than when I left home and this is what that feels like.

Mikey broke even on the dogs but we can't all be winners and this is what that feels like.

Next year Curry Club will be off to Newmarket for a Friday afternoon horse racing meeting and we'll all loose our shirts.
They have a gig in the evening so we are going to book for Jules Holland in the summer.
Next Curry Club will be a standard City job so I will try to get some piccies for another post around early Feb.

To Alice

2007-12-10T09:08:00.000Z

I've been inspired recently by the pictures which Kate has been posting and it will end up costing me money, as I have to replace my old faithful Nikon with one of those new fangled digital jobbies.

Anyway, as Kate is about to get the decorations dusted off and everyone is preparing for the Festival of Greed in their own way, all your posts prompted me to pass on one of the memories of Christmas that will stay with me forever.

I was down at the boatyard which is owned by one of my oldest friends and he asked if I would mind nipping over with him to see his mother and deliver some garden furniture.
His mother's name was Alice, she sadly passed away a couple of years ago, and she was a wonderful character. She was from an old Romany family and had a real twinkle in her eye, a superb dry sense of humour and a real warmth, calmness and wisdom that made you think "well that's o.k. then".

We loaded up the truck and drove the five miles to Alice's house, un-loaded the garden table and struggled with it down the side of the house and into the back garden.
"Where do you want this Alice" I asked, and that's when it started.

Alice - "You see that bit down the bottom by the hedge"?

Us - (carrying the table) "yes"

Alice - "Well don't put it there because it only gets the sun in the morning. That grass by the apple tree....."

Us - (carrying the table) "yes"

Alice - "I don't think I want it there....."

This went on for a bit and the we said "don't tell us where you don't want it Alice, it's too bloody heavy to run around the garden with"

We settled on the perfect spot in the end and Alice suggested we had a cup of tea and could we help her sort her decorations for the tree.
We were greeted by 2 large boxes of baubles and tinsel and 2 large boxes of tree lights which looked they had been dragged through somewhere that lights shouldn't be dragged.
A nice cup of tea and 45 minutes later we had un-tangled the lights and checked through every single bulb to make sure they were all tight and would not pose a fire risk.
30 minutes later we had to admit that we couldn't get any of the damn things to work and did Alice want us to get her some new ones.
All this time Alice and her neighbour had us in hysterics with their stories and were watching us getting more and more frustrated at our failure to fix the lights.

Alice - "That's o.k. they didn't work last year either so I got some more, do you want another cup of tea"?

It always makes me smile when I think of that morning over at Alice's house and it's a shame that the spirit of friendship, family and good humour is lacking in these days of consumerism and selfishness.

We will raise a glass to Alice again this year as we meander down the river to the Wherry Pub for our annual winter trip and remember the laughs we shared for so many years.

Keeping warm

2007-11-25T11:10:00.000Z

So it's -150 degrees outside and it's spitting that really cold rain that "soaks you through".

The perfect day to start the garden project.
I got a couple of mates round and we attacked the big shrubs and forged a path along the old knackered fence in order to rip it all out.

10 cups of coffee, a load of sandwiches and 6 hours later we had the new panels up.
We were warmer by now!

This is "Ceefor" (C for cat), my garden cat thinking "what the hell's going on in my territory".

Next stage is to get the tree muncher round and turn all this crap into wood chippings, then start getting some plants and rocks together for the spring.
I need some tall stuff for the bottom of the garden, maybe some bamboo, and rocks and pebbles planted with alpines, and maples etc along the stream and the pond.
Any suggestions gratefully accepted as I'm not a garden designer.

Evolution

2007-11-13T19:57:00.001Z

Dr Who regenerates from time to time.
He is a Time Lord for those who didn't grow up here in the sixties and seventies. Fought the Daleks, the Cybermen, the Yeti, the Zarbies (they go back a bit, but I hope Dive remembers them. Or did I dream them) and many other cheap "special effects" alien monsters.

It's been up-dated over the last couple of years and is worth a watch, if only for Billie Piper in the first two series.

Anyway, as a Deity, I also have the ability to re-generate at will, so as I have my new Mac, I thought it might be fun to have a change.

This is the new me working hard using my psychic powers to make pretty patterns on the screen.

It's tough to use the keyboard with no fingers.

So what do you think, is the new look o.k. or should I change back?

Roo

2007-11-07T19:10:00.001Z

I've just popped back from Rich's site and Lin's recipe page.
MMMMMmmmm food.

This reminds me, I cooked the kangaroo steaks a couple of weeks ago.

Dive was over here to help set up my new mac so it was a good enough reason to try something new.
It was quite simple fare in the end, a quick mushroom & onion sauce with chilli, wine, garlic and lots of black pepper. New potatoes, lightly crushed and mixed with spring onions (scallions for Rich), butter and wholegrain mustard, petit pois for a bit of colour and the roo whacked onto a hot griddle pan and cooked until medium rare.

It was bloody fantastic. For me it tasted like pork with a hint of liver and the consistency of fillet steak.

I will get some more.

Zebra or wildebeest is next.

Leafy things

2007-11-03T12:03:00.000Z

As we have all been waiting for the trees to get with the program and realise it's autumn, I thought I would wait until the sun was out on Thursday and snap the road outside the factory.

I had to rely on my friend Karen to let me know the sun was shining because I don't have any windows in my office. She rang around mid afternoon and by the time I got out it was dull again but I took the picture anyway.

I had a wander around Kett Hall after I had my breakfast coffee with Big Bro this morning.
The gardeners cut small trees from time to time and lay them down to be reclaimed by nature. There are lots of trunks and log piles around the place all becoming interesting with mosses, fungi and all things dark and mysterious.

This is the old path from the side of the Hall which leads down to a small wooden bridge over the top end of the lake. I don't think too many people ever come down here but they should. It's very peaceful and there are all manner of birds and furry creatures wandering around without paying too much attention to me.

This is for Lynn's "who has the best leaves" competition. I tried to count them but all I can say is there are more than 7.

This only makes me want to get a decent camera and not have to use my phone.
The light coming through these leaves would really benefit from some spot exposure and filters. Looked nice at the time though.

This is the old willow which we climb to spot big carp cruising in the summer. Shame the fucking otter killed and ate them all. Looks like we need to shift some more weed.

This would look better with a flash but the moss was nice. Maybe I could nail some of Dive's pigeons to it.

Light

2007-11-02T07:58:00.001Z

There was a really weird look about the sky the other day.
I took this around 06:45 as I arrived at work.
Either it was one of those strange Norfolk autumnal dawns or something had just gone very wrong in the test cells behind the stores building.

More beer

2007-10-25T09:47:00.000+01:00

I have the day off today. I thought it would be for the best as I was at the 30th Norwich beer festival last night with a few mates.
It is held in St Andrews Hall, a beautiful setting usually used for choirs, orchestral works etc but one week a year it is turned over to "Camra" the campaign for real ale.

This is like Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory for beer drinkers.
Below is one side of the main double sided bar with a smaller cider bar on the opposite wall.
To the right is Blackfriars Hall with food and the local Norfolk ales. There is also a huge marquee housing all the bottled beers and world beers.

Music is provided by various bands during the week, last night it was The Cawston Band playing everything from The Dambusters March and The Floral Dance to Queen and The Police. Very entertaining. There are also steel bands, skiffle, jazz, a string quartet and organ music, so something for everyone.

We even had bagpipes last night!

No too sure what these two were up to though. Maybe groupies or Scottish super heroes!

My own personal favourite beers were there of course, as Mark the brewer has been charging about running the cellar at the festival for years.

Mark owns and runs Beeston Brewery and when he is not clambering around on the racks changing barrels he tries to make sure we get to taste the best beers in the room. Cheers mate.

The festival made the local news for another reason this year. A sparrowhawk flew into the main hall on Monday when all the bars were being set up and decided to stay, perched quite happily in the rafters.

The R.S.P.B. spent hours with a dead pheasant tied to a piece of string trying to lure the bird out but to no avail. I didn't manage to get a picture but it got headline news in the local rag and no, we didn't get shat on.

Rugger and stuff

2007-10-22T19:00:00.000+01:00

Lynn asked what I thought of the rugby World Cup Final.

Well, if someone had told me six weeks ago that we would lose in the Final, I would have been happy considering all the crap people were writing and saying about the "grumpy old men" of the "washed up with no chance of progressing past the pool stages" England squad.

The best team overall in the tournament ended up winning which is the way it should be.

As for the ref and the Australian fourth official, (the one who said it wasn't a try) well there's no point whinging because it wasn't given, well played the Springboks, move on.

Oh and well played Argentina for spanking France in the 3rd - 4th place play-off on Friday evening.

Next stop for England is a new squad with hopefully a few grumpy old men still around with a sprinkling of young talent to take the Six Nations after Christmas but with an eye on New Zealand and the next World Cup in 2011.

I will be blogging on my new i-mac after next weekend if Dive can get it hooked up for me.
No more p.c. for me, I have been converted.
We had some sweary fun on Saturday and Sunday after I bought it and we couldn't get on t'internet because BT are fucking crap and only send out installation packs for p.c.'s.
Never mind, I'm sure Big Bro can get it all sorted this week end.

There is also an impending regeneration on the cards for The Monkey God.
Dr Who does this every now and again and I can feel it in my bones so watch this space.

Waterloo II

2007-10-14T08:27:00.000+01:00

So it's Au revoir to "Les Bleus" for this World Cup.

Into the Stade de France went the brave 15. Well 22 actually as there were also 7 substitutes, without whom we could not have beaten France.
They didn't have to face cannon but there was Sebastan Chaball, nicknamed "The Caveman".
I know how effective he is because he plays in the English Premiership for Sale.

14 points to 9 after a bruising encounter.
It may not have been pretty but the passion and commitment was there for both sides.
I'm nearly out of beer now after beating the Aussies last week and now France, with the Final next weekend against either South Africa or Argentina, a trip to the brewery is in order.
France will have their chance for revenge around Feb/March next year when we play them again in Paris in the Six-Nations tournament.
Should be interesting.

What a shame.......Never mind.

2007-10-07T09:08:00.000+01:00

As a life-long rugby freak, with Leicester Tigers and England running through my veins, I would like to take the opportunity for a tiny little gloat.
O.K. so Gloucester beat us at home last night but this was just a bit of payback for them because we rather "stuffed" them in the Premiership Final last May. ( I was there, and it was awesome), and they were the better team, so that's one for Lynn.
The big story here is the exit of both Australia and the All Blacks. (that's New Zealand by the way).
There has been a lot of derogatory talk in the media from various parties within the Australia camp about the current World Champions, ( that's England by the way) but maybe eating a large portion of humble pie will take away the taste of their collective feet in their oversize gobs.

I feel for all the Aussies who get tarred with the same brush because I know quite a few from down under and they are all thoroughly good eggs.

I stick by my prediction that South Africa will win but my heart still says England.
Thanks to the French for coping with the "always peaking too soon" All Blacks who have, yet again not taken the pressure game.
With the Aussies it's over-confidence but New Zealand just didn't react to a fired-up France who were fighting for more than just national pride as they are the hosts for this World Cup.

Anyway, as the Aussies are no longer represented, I though I would celebrate.
I need some help from Kate on this as I'm not too sure what recipe is best for Roo.

I also need the perfect Australian (whine) to go with this. Maybe "shatto Mortlock"? definitely best served cold.
Dive, you are invited next weekend to celebrate one northern hemisphere side's guaranteed passage into the final.
I hope it's us but if not, then "bon chance mes amis" because William Webb Ellis should live north of the equator.

She's here !!

2007-10-03T17:39:00.000+01:00

This looks kinda cool.

It's by a French born artist called Louise Bourgeois and titled Maman 1999.

It's 9 metres high and made from bronze, stainless steel and marble.

Dive dosn't go to London on Thursdays, now we know why.

Shelob springs to mind.

Morning coffee

2007-09-30T08:54:00.001+01:00

As inhabitants of The Small Glass Planet will know, I usually meet Dive on a Saturday morning for a fix of coffee, a "grump" about the previous week and a wander around the book shops and back streets of Norwich looking for anything interesting.

Several signs have been seen recently which, as we are in Norfolk, could cause some confusion with certain members of the shopping public.

I don't agree with this one. The Norfolk landscape is superb any time of the year. Huge skies of bright blue dotted with cotton wool clouds in the summer, menacing storm clouds in the autumn and winter and an ever changing carpet of fresh worked fields, ranging from rich dark brown through green, purple, brilliant yellow and warm gold as the year passes.

Another misleading offer found in an office supply store which boasts a limb replacement service if you buy a chair!

We spotted a number of other rather amusing advertising faux pas and as the festive season is now arriving in our shops, I'm sure this could develop into a hobby.

Dive, don't forget your camera next week.

Catch up

2007-09-22T11:44:00.001+01:00

So apart from work, what does a Deity get up to to keep him from Blogger for so long?

Well if you want the low-down on the Goodwood Revival this year, pop over to Dive's and see what you missed if you didn't attend. (and this one too)

That was good day #1

Good day #2 was a trip to London to visit the relatives. Well we are somewhat removed from them but with evolution and all that, there must be a link somewhere.
This is why they became extinct, supermodel diet regimes and heads full of plaster.

You should quit while you are still "a head" (well I thought it was amusing).

Good day #3 was at one of my favourite places, Twickenham.

I am usually here to watch rugby but I made an exception for The Police world tour, plus it was a chance to get on the pitch and see what it's like to look back up to where we sit.

Below is the view from our seats

It was one of the best gigs I've seen and the sound quality was superb.

They do look old on the big screens but they still put on a phenomenal show.

We have an open day at work this Sunday and I am taking Big Bro, so check out his post on that because he is excited about it and it's just an extra bloody day at work to me.

If you like big boys toys it should be good day #4.

Transmissions will be resumed shortly

2007-09-19T19:55:00.000+01:00

It's been a while, so if anyone is out there, I should have some time to post some of whats been going on since June (ish).

It's mostly been work but I got to see The Police at Twickenham a couple of weeks ago so there's some piccies etc and if you follow my Bro dive, you will know I popped up to London with him to see the dino's and stuff.
Oh, and Goodwood.

Yours truly enjoying a pint of the Black stuff on the pitch at Twickers before the gig.

It was a good gig.

Something for everyone

2007-06-25T20:12:00.001+01:00

I was out with some friends on Saturday night. We went to the small market town of Bungay, about 5 miles from my old home town.
The beer is good and the locals mostly have the correct finger to head ratio of 8:1 plus 2 thumbs.

We usually start in a pub called The Fleece and work our way through the town ending at The Chequers.
This night however, we were dropped in the centre of town and took a different route to The Fleece.
Walking up the hill I noticed that Bungay had joined the ranks of the open-minded society and now has specialist shops for all persuasions.

I'm told there is a brass plaque on the floor in one corner which bears the legend "Brace yourself"

Stress relief

2007-06-23T12:19:00.001+01:00

I've had a bloody busy month.

How dare other people have holidays and time off for "Man flu" and "hurty tummies".
Wimps, wheres their fucking commitment.

Anyway, I managed to get away Friday afternoon for a bit of R&R at our lake. Yes those are my "wellies" and Dive, you paid for the top couple of feet of that rod with the cash you gave me for my birthday, thanks.

I am fortunate to have been a member of our little fishing club for the last 20 years. It is exclusive to employees and old Formula 1 team members.
The lake is in the grounds of the old hall where the race team had their headquarters in the good old days of World Championships with Andretti, Fittipaldi, Peterson, Senna, Mansell et al.
It's only 5 minutes from the factory and me and a few of the guys needed to unwind so we had a dangle in the lake....................... Then we went fishing.

It's very peaceful over there and one is surrounded by nature in all her finery.
As I sit contemplating life, the universe and everything, I am watching a kingfisher catching fry not ten feet away. Dragonflies are content to sit on my float, rod, feet or hands without any apparent fear, and a barn owl is hunting in the field behind me.

The swans didn't want me to get any closer than this though, as they thought their cygnets needed protection from me and a camera. "HHHHIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSS", they said.

That's the rear of the Hall on the far side of the lake. We left this end un-disturbed until later in the year so the swans can raise their family.

We do have a new arrival this year, an otter. I love to see them on our rivers and coasts but this one turned up at our lake earlier in the year and has killed and eaten most of the big carp.

We had several fish over 30lbs and at least 20 fish from 15 to 25lbs which have been found almost entirely eaten, just a few bones and scales are all that was left. If we were to replace these the bill would run into thousands of pounds and Mr Otter would get another fish buffet so we will wait to see if he moves on later in the year.

All we can do is get as many members to fish as often as possible this year and hope the human presence will be enough to encourage him to bugger off and eat someone else's fish.

Maybe I should ask Old Knudsen, I'm sure he could come up with a plan.

Tarka tikka kebabs anyone?

Mmmmmmmmmmm Beer

2007-06-04T20:19:00.000+01:00

Spent the week end with an old work colleague who chucked in the rat race last year and opened his own brewery.

It's in a small converted out-building next to the old farmhouse he bought with his partner Rachel.

They have worked bloody hard since the middle of last year to get the business going and work on the house, so I thought I would offer my services for a bit of painting/moral support and so I could pinch some of his flints for the stream in my garden.

This is the church across the field which he uses as his logo (see wrought iron sign above). The vicar is a good customer!

So I spent the weekend staining and waxing oak beams, painting, building cupboards, eating nice food and drinking excellent beer at the village pub. Yes it came from Marks Brewery.

No time this week end but I hope to give him a hand with a brew some time soon which will be great. Finding out how the flavours are developed and the chemistry/alchemy which turns hops, yeast, sugar and his own underground spring water, along with some eye of newt and wing of bat etc into beer. Mmmmmmmmmm.

Just for Sassy

2007-05-31T19:25:00.000+01:00

We have an ancient publication over here called The Radio Times.
It is the original T.V. listings magazine and still my favourite. It only used to list BBC T.V. and radio programmes but now has all the major broadcast info for satellite and cable etc.

As I know Sassy is a Grey's addict and I have never seen the show, I thought I would post the write-up for "Today's choices"

DIGITAL/CABLE CHOICES

Grey's Anatomy
10.00pm Living

Grey's is the TV equivalent of a not entirely genuine sick day spent listening to Westlife and eating cream straight from the pot, all the while dressed in pink polka-dot pyjamas.
It's shallow, sinful and girlier than kittens.
Meredith Grey is a fuzzy basket case, and her girl surgeon chums aren't much better.
The chaps are dreadfully bland, sensitive alpha males in awe of the women folk.
This week, a girl doctor bakes her way through her grief and Meredith can't decide whether she wants Dr McDeamy or McOther One.
Series three continues tonight.
Watch it, but don't tell anyone you did.

How could it fail to get top ratings with that endorsement.

May even be worth a look.....................only kidding.

Sassy, the reviewer is called Ruth Margolis, you may want to visit her in the small hours and put a bat up her nightdress.

It gets lots of publicity on the satellite channels over here so you have Brit allies.

Rain?

2007-05-27T09:47:00.000+01:00

It's Bank Holiday weekend again and the forecast is chilly and wet.

Now I'm not going to go banging on about "it always rains on Bank Holiday" because I don't really care what the weather is like. If it rains I have stuff to do inside, and if it's fine then I have to finish re-building the stream which which runs into my pond, and wash the car and a whole bunch of other stuff.

Anyway, it rained a bit yesterday afternoon and I kind of liked the way the water formed on the irises in the pond, so here are a couple of piccies.

The blue one flowered for the first time this year. A nice supprise as I thought they were all yellow.

Got a new Japanese koi last week, he's called Bob, and was in hiding with all the other Bob's when I took these.

Horses arse.....again

2007-05-23T20:54:00.000+01:00

We lost the European Cup Final.

Bugger.

London Wasps stuck to a good game plan, stopped us from playing and were worthy of the win, although it pains me to admit it.

Still, we did end up winning the EDF Anglo-Welsh Cup and we are the English Premiership Champions and I had 2 top days out at Twickers this year with The Tigers so it was a pretty good season in the end.

Roll on the World Cup En France later in the year. Must get tickets, must get tickets, must get tickets...........................

My Babies

2007-05-19T20:52:00.000+01:00

Some people put pictures of their babies on their blogs, some people describe their work or their passion or their hobbies.

For me it's all the same.

I started out 30 years ago as an "old lag" mechanic who had to learn how to paint cars because nobody else could be arsed, and someone had to do it.

I'm now Senior Process Engineer responsible for main colour application, critical process, and all aspects of Manufacturing Engineering regarding body and paint.
(Yes, I get paid to watch paint dry).

I also love my job, although it drives me crazy sometimes, so I thought I would post a few pictures of some of the "out of hours" stuff I get involved in along with 4 or 5 of my fellow lunatic colleagues when we are not focused on production.

This is a carbon race car which two of us had to prepare and paint with the usual ample planned timescale, ("you got 4 days cos we have to get it to the docks next Tuesday")!!!

We love the Motor sport guys.

It was a lot of fun although the panels were pretty crap from the tooling but four 16 hour days later we were finished. The car got built, photographed and on the boat bang on time.

Nice ass don't you think.
I'll put some more on soon but it's the rugby final tomorrow so that comes first.

Two down, one to go......

2007-05-15T20:14:00.000+01:00

On the 15th of April this year I was at Twickenham to see Leicester Tigers play Ospreys in the EDF Cup Final.
A fantastic game which we won after a tough second half.

Last Saturday I was at Twickers again for the Guinness Premiership Final against Gloucester.
Both teams finished the season on 71 points but Gloucester were placed top as they had one more win than us.
We actually got 72 points but were penalised a point for fielding a player before he was eligible. (silly buggers).

This was set to be a hard fought final as we had lost scrum half Harry Ellis, one of our key players, in the semi-final the previous week end.

Below we find the boys having a warm up before getting into it.

We were down by 3 points after 5 minutes and a shaky start but then got it together and just blew Gloucester away.
Awesome is about the only way to describe it, with apologies to any Gloucester folk, they were simply no match for The Tigers on the day.

Final score Tigers 44 Gloucester 16.

It's another trophy in the cabinet, fireworks and champagne and a quick celebration before next Sunday.

We are again at Twickenham in the European Cup Final. I have to satisfy myself with watching on T.V. as I was too late to get tickets for this one.

The first all English European Cup Final against our old enemy London Wasps.

Keep all your bits crossed for me on Sunday and you should hear the cheers if we win.

No team has ever won the treble so no pressure !!!!!

Antwerpen part 2

2007-05-05T07:50:00.000+01:00

It's been a shitty couple of weeks, not the squirty tummy type but the phenomenally busy and hassle filled type.

Still, it's a long weekend and Leicester are still on for an historic treble after a tough semi-final against Bristol on Saturday afternoon. So Twickenham beckons again for me next weekend, organic burgers, Guinness and hopefully victory against Gloucester for the 2007 Championship Trophy.

Anyway, it's time to conclude the Belgium saga, as I had a bunch of them over here last week contributing to the hassle.

The spectacular building in the background is Het Steen. One of the earliest stone buildings in the City, dating back to the 13th century and first known as Antwerp castle, it was re-named around 1520 after significant re-building by Charles V. This led to the name "Heeren Steen" (Kings stone) later shortened to Het Steen.
The castle made it possible to control access to the river Scheldt running through Antwerp and was also used as a prison between 1303 & 1827. Part of the building was later demolished to provide materials to make roads to connect the North and South ends of the port and today Het Steen houses the National Maritime Museum. (sorry Lynn, no carrots but just for you here is the link to the carrot museum again).

Above the entrance is a relief statue depicting a man with spread legs who at one time also had a huge penis. It was visited by women in the hope of providing a cure for infertility. This oversize member didn't go down too well with the Jesuits and in the 17th century they gave him "the op" and removed his naughty bits, (no sense of fun those Jesuits).

There seems to be something about giants in Belgian folklore. Maybe it's the chocolate that makes them grow so big, but I saved the best one until last.

The big guy in front of Het Steen is Lange Wapper, Antwerp's version of the boogie man. A mythical demon known in many folklore tales in the Antwerp area. He appears here to be farting at some peasants but he was known for more than that.

Lange Wapper liked to live near water and loved to stroll along the banks of the Scheldt in Antwerp.
He could make himself as small as a child or as big as a giant and had a penchant for picking up fishing boats by the mast and throwing them around.
He liked to play "stamp on your hat" with children and enjoyed teasing drunks then vanishing with a devilish laugh.
He was also a bit of a "perv" who liked to get intimate with the ladies.
Using his powers, he turned himself into a white handkerchief in order to be picked up by a passing beauty and was tucked into her "under garments". He also took the form of a new born baby and laid himself on a stone bench outside the butchers hall. a woman who had just had a baby took pity on the crying child and put it to her breast. At this point Wapper returned to his true form and gave the young mother the fright of her life. Sounds like a top bloke to take for a night on the piss with the lads.

I have been promised a tour to Bruges with Anne, one of my Belgian conspiritors next time I get over there so this may not be the end of the Phlegms. Ja manekes.

Poo in the eye

2007-04-22T07:47:00.000+01:00

This just caught my eye on the news page so I thought I should share it.

Making paper from roo poo is a great idea.
Wonder if we could make it by using all the crap that tumbles from the mouths of our "leaders"?
An inexhaustible supply there I think.

Tigers

2007-04-16T19:57:00.000+01:00

I have to interrupt the Phlegmish ramblings to celebrate an all round top day on Sunday.

I drove down to Twickenham with a few like minded mates for the final of the EDF Energy Cup between Leicester Tigers and The Ospreys, who are an amalgamation of the old pre-regional Welsh clubs, Neath and Swansea.
The weather was fantastic. First job was to grab the best burger outside of the Goodwood Revival fare, which is on the car park at the college opposite the stadium. These are made from finest organic beef and are best savoured medium/rare. Mmmmmmmmmmmm.
Next stop, the loo for a well earned "comfort break", then on to the Guinness trailer with it's gorgeous girls behind the bar.
Wonderful atmosphere as we all wandered around sipping beer in glorious sunshine, 25°C and chatting with the Ospreys and Tigers fans. Something unheard of with football followers. (can't bring myself to call them fans).
Got into the ground and found our seats to watch the second half of the game which preceded the main final.
This was a cracking match between Exeter Chiefs and Penzance & Newlyn, also known as the Cornish Pirates.
The Pirates finished on top at 19 - 16 and as we were sitting next to loads of Pirates fans, we added our support to theirs.
There then followed a "sing-off" between The Treorchy Male Choir and The Odd Fellows & Huntingdon Male Voice Choirs to mirror the Wales v England make-up of the final. The Aveley & Newham Brass Band played for both Choirs and all 45,000 of the crowd joined in. It was bloody brilliant.

I raised my glass to Sassy just before kick-off as promised and wished her good luck with The Move.
Hope your day was as rewarding as mine Sassy.

As you can see, they haven't finished putting the roof on the south stand yet, which explains why I had such a bastard job getting tickets. There were about 35,ooo seats which were off limits.

The main final started with a bit of a worry as we went 6-0 down to two early penalties but then we cut loose and ran in three tries to go in at half time leading by 28-6.

The Ospreys obviously had a good talking to at the break because they came out and hit back with three tries followed by a penalty and another try.
They played some fantastic fast, free flowing rugby and made a superb contest of the second half. Tigers finally managed to get a grip with a penalty and then a late try to seal the win at 41-35.

All credit to the Ospreys for a wonderful display and it is a pity someone had to lose. I am glad it was us who won in the end as we have not had much joy in semi's and finals over the last 5 years. We got to lots but always lost, having won 4 Championships in a row and consecutive European Cup Finals during 1998 - 2001 it's time we had some success.

The Tigers above, waiting for the stage to be built on the pitch before collecting the cup.
About bloody time too.

We have a European Cup semi-final this Saturday and the play-offs to qualify for the Championship Final to be played on May 5th. I have rather optimistically got my tickets for that final so I just hope we make it. (We lost in the final to Sale last year, and yes I was there with a good friend who used to play for Sale, not that he mentions it much).

Antwerpen part 1

2007-04-12T20:13:00.000+01:00

Lets start with the legend of Brabo and Antigoon, no not a 15th century Eurovision song entry but, some say, the origin for the naming of the city.

This greenish chappie below is our hero, Silvius Brabo, a roman soldier. Sorry but I didn't manage to get a picture of his adversary.

A long time ago in a city far far away lived a giant named Druoon Antigoon. He stalked the banks of the river Scheldt which flows through Antwerp and was a major trade route for the city.
Antigoon demanded a toll be paid by the sailors on the Scheldt and if any refused he would cut off their hands as a punishment. (a bit harsh in my opinion but consistent with the times and the code of practice for giants).
Silvius Brabo challenged the giant and finally defeated him. He then cut off Antigoons hand and cast it into the river as an act of defiance.
Hant (hand) werpen (to throw) the act of hand throwing sprung from this legend and after dropping the "H" Antwerpen was named. Or maybe you know different.

Nice statue though. It's also a fountain and was created by Jef Lambeaux in 1887. Thanks Jef.

This is the Cathedral of Our Lady on the other side of the Grand place. Started in 1352 and not completed until 1521. A build time un-equalled until recently with that of Wembley Stadium.

In the small street to the left of the awning is an Irish bar run by a couple of Dublin's finest and the Guinness flowed like, Guinness, hence the none too sharp night shots.

Another side of the square is bordered by these magnificent guild houses.

Although the originals were destroyed by fire in 1576, they were re-built by the town architect, Hans Vredeman. Renovated again in the 19th century, the grandest is number 7 which belonged to the Guild of Archers and is crowned by a gold statue of St George.

Not sure what St G has to do with bows and arrows but there you go.

Behind the Brabo fountain is the Town Hall. Completed in 1564 it was meant to be a Gothic masterpiece but most of the building materials were used to defend against attack from the army of Maarten Van Rossern. (Rumour has it he picked on Antwerp because they spelled Martin in a silly way). I think the Antwerp defenders must have thrown bricks and rubble to repel the invaders and it took them 20 years to collect it all again.

By the time the city was in a more stable financial position the fashions had changed and the gothic style was replaced by renaissance. I'm sure Dive will reflect on the "superposition of Dorian and Ionic columns" but for the rest of us it just looks a little fussy and confused I think.

The two statues either side of the gilded coat of arms are The Lady Justitia and The Lady Prudentia, names worthy of a place in any good Carry-on film. Above them is a Madonna which was placed there by the Jesuits during the counter-reformation to replace a Brabo statue considered "too heathen" for the time.

I think this would be a good one for Dives "Look-up" series.

3 at last

2007-04-11T09:02:00.000+01:00

This is just a quickie and a taste of Antwerp. It really is a fantastic place, if a little strange. This is a statue dedicated to the harbour workers who gave so much to build the City economy over the years. Either that or the dodgy folk who worked the docks showing sailors a good time. I think his pose is a little suspect.

The inscription "Arbeid Vrijheid" means Labour = Freedom or, depending on your point of view, "Get it Here Big Boy"

2....

2007-03-26T19:28:00.000+01:00

So here we are again, back in Mechelen and looking the other way across the square. The best bit about this place is the absence of cars. When I started coming over about 7 years ago this was full of parked cars, so the council put up the cash and dug it all up, carried out an archaeological dig, built a massive underground car park and re-laid the original pave. You can still get taken out by a fast moving bicycle but it is a nice place to wander. Anyway, this is the view from the Town Hall across to St. Rumbold's Tower and Cathedral.

The first part of the Cathedral was started in the 13th century, around 1217 (just after lunch), and was continually enlarged throughout the 14th & 15th century with work starting on the tower in 1452 (just before afternoon tea).
The tower was to remain un-finished due to financial constraints and the Religious Wars of the 16th century.
As you can see, they still can't afford enough scaffolding to clean it all.

Today the tower stands just over 97 metres high but was originally designed to be 160 metres.
It houses 98 bells weighing in at a slender 80 tons and it all works, I've heard it.
Every Monday evening from June to mid September the bells are rung for an hour and it's very impressive.

Below is a model on display inside the Cathedral which shows the original tower design. (WOW)!!!

The inside is not too shabby either. (WOW again)!!!

Just behind the Cathedral is a smaller square with an excellent Greek restaurant called........ "Zorbas". Honestly.

Nearby is what must be the smallest balcony in the World. I think the pots contain bonsai and cress.

Now, if anyone can tell me what the f*ck this is all about I will send some Belgian choc's.

It is, as you can see, a small shiny cow tied to someones front door.
I am thinking of starting a campaign to find good homes for such unfortunate creatures. It has nothing to eat or drink and it's movement is restricted to the length of the pink string with which it is so cruelly bound.

Or maybe they couldn't afford a dog.

Just to finish this bit here is some fun with paint and half a bug.

Next stop Antwerp and the giants.

Testing, testing.....1

2007-03-22T20:43:00.000Z

Once in a while my job takes me to various interesting places. I get to take my bro to Silverstone for a full Formula 1 testing session and hospitality with the Jaguar race team, I visit Aston Martin, Mclaren, Bentley, the Mini factory, trips to France, Germany, Malaysia and with luck, Japan and U.S.A. this year if I can swing it.
Once in a while I get to go to Belgium for test and development of paint systems. (Yeeaaahh).

It's been a while since my last visit so it was nice to catch up with the guy's over there.
"There" being Mechelen, a very nice market town half way between Brussels and Antwerp.

So, the sunrise finds us being all "arty farty" with Lizzie's bridge, the majestic Queen Elizabeth II bridge, taken through the windscreen of the car while trying not to crash.

We negotiate the M25 without too much trouble and meet up with Taz at Ashford in Kent.
Taz works for our paint supplier. He is the kindest, most patient person I know.
Born in Pakistan, raised in Kenya and a Muslim, living in England has been interesting for him over the last few years but he takes everything in his stride and has a wonderful sense of humour. He also makes the best spice mix in the world. (Am I right Dive)?
After a hearty English breakfast and a mug of tea, we toddle off to the jewel of the south east. Eurotunnel, a wonderful picturesque setting where we embark on our adventure.

Inspiring don't you think!

At least it's fast. The crossing takes 35 minutes and you drive off the train and onto the main motorway along the French coast which takes us all the way to Brussels. Easy peasy.
The Brussels ring (oh er misses) is a doddle and it is then 30 minutes up the road towards Antwerp and we turn off to Mechelen.

One thing I always notice when driving in Europe, besides them all driving on the wrong side of the bloody road, is that everyone tends to use the lanes on motorways correctly. If they overtake, they then pull back in rather than piss around in the fast lane and clog it up because their ego tells them they are excellent drivers and MUST be in front of you. This is standard practice for most of the wankers who use our roads. (sorry, that's a potential rant for another day).

This is the view from the back of our workshops and lab.
Now I'm no conspiracy theorist but for all those who have seen the movie Men in Black, this looks suspiciously like another not too well hidden spaceship disguised as a water tower. Didn't see any big bugs hanging around though.

Anyway, more about sunny Mechelen.

Anne Boleyn lived there for a bit and the current Mayors name is Bart (eat my shorts) Somers.

This is one end of the wonderfully named Grote Markt' or Town square and all of that is the Stadhuis (Town Hall).
It's actually 3 distinct buildings, one of which you cannot see on this photo for reasons I will explain in a bit.

The oldest part is the Gothic Lakenhalle or cloth hall built from 1320 - 1326 and modelled on the one in Bruges. This was never completed due to the decline in the cloth trade. A huge fire swept through Mechelen in 1342 but this part of the town was not badly damaged and the building has been restored and altered over the years.
In the 16th century plans were drawn up to replace the hall with a new Palace for the Grand Council. This work stopped around 1547 and the Council hung around letting out parts of the building to shop keepers, then buggered off in 1614.
This east wing was eventually finished according to the original plans in the 20th century.
The third part of the building (not in the pic cos it's round the back) is a contentious L-shaped building added in 1975 which contrasts somewhat with it's historic neighbours.

At the western end of the square in front of the Town Hall is this statue. At first I assumed it was to commemorate the joys falling down drunk or lighting farts but the truth is out there.
It is called Op-Signoorke.

Op-Signoorke is the name given to a large carved wooden doll dating back to 1647, which is carried in parades and tossed into the air as it makes it's way through the town.

In July 1775 it was bring carried at the back of a procession and, as it entered St-Katelijnestreet, the doll fell into the crowd of on-lookers. Jacobus de Leeuw, from nearby Antwerp, was in the crowd and as Op-Signoorke fell towards him he raised his arms to protect himself and was subsequently accused of trying to steal the doll.

The enraged townsfolk grabbed the poor bloke, beat him up a bit and took him before the magistrate who jailed him. Jacobus managed to escape soon afterwards and sent a letter of protest to the magistrate. (a letter indeed.....he must have been so pissed with them).

From that time on, the people of Mechelen took precautions to prevent any revenge from Antwerp and Op-Signoorke was kept locked in a large trunk.

On December 7th 1949 Mechelen was shocked to discover that the doll had gone missing. Students from Antwerp, made out to be American tourists, managed to gain access to the Municipal Museum where the original doll is kept and kidnapped it. Op-Signoorke was eventually returned to Mechelen in January 1950. (Silly buggers).

Enough for now. In the next Phlegmy extract we look the other way across the Grote Markt' towards the stunning St.Rumbold's Cathedral and you can try to explain the mystery of the small shiny cow.

Intro

2007-03-17T11:09:00.000Z

Not much spare time this weekend, Leicester at home to Bath (the old enemy), last weekend of the Six Nations Rugby, first Formula one Grand Prix and St Patricks Day. So I had a pint of Guinness and a Jameson's last night.
Just a quickie before I try to sort out the Belgium stuff, I found the Carrot Museum !!!! so try the link as an introduction to all things Belgian.

Pheewww !!!

2007-03-12T19:26:00.000Z

That was a busy week. Worked hard, painted lots of stuff, tested lots of stuff, analysed lots of stuff, made a presentation about lots of stuff but didn't get a chance to see lots of stuff as we were so bloody busy.

So this is just a quickie to say that spring sprung in my garden while I was away.........

.......and The outdoor "Bobs" are swimming around like "Mad Jack McMad", winner of last years Mr Madman competition.

Might feature The Bob's when the big old boys are around on the top and I can get some decent pics of them and their indoor relatives.

Will get the process engineers guide to Belgium on the go very soon.

Bad news, nobody I spoke to had heard of the carrot museum so some web searching is in order.

There is, however, a small shiny cow, some ostrich medallions, snails, Giants and the other spaceship from MIB to be considered so watch this space. (in a few days).

Off to the Land of The Phelgms... or are they The Flemmish?

2007-03-04T19:35:00.000Z

Just a quickie to say I will be bloody glad to get away in the morning for a rest!

Busy time trying to fit in everything I have to do on a normal weekend into Sunday morning as I spent Saturday on a boat trying to catch some pike, and I did,.........which was nice!

Today I had to go to work, pick up a pool car, load all the crap I need for a week of testing in Belgium, get to my mates brewery by 13:00 for his opening festivities and curse the bloody rain.
Why rain today? Mark the brewer gives his used hops to a farmer from down the lane, who in turn feeds it to his piggies. (pigs love hops) The farmer donated one of said piggies in order to have a hog roast for today.
We ate the pig which ate the hops which made the beer. Mmmmmmmmmmm.
There were also some Morris dancers (sill buggers who wear bells, wave hankies around, hit each other with sticks and jump up and down) they also like real ale so that makes it o.k. and lots of free food and beer. Guess who was driving?
Picked up a couple of boxes of bottled beer for home sampling and split them with big bro as he needs his liquids to re-hydrate after his encounters with an exercise bike.
Eventually got home around 15:30, just in time to finish off the washing, then do the ironing, tidy the house in case I get burgled, (I wouldn't want them to rob a messy house), cook dinner, pack and set the alarm for 04:30 tomorrow.

I will try to get some piccies and have an adventure and solve a mystery (darn, I would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for those pesky kids) and come home on Friday laden with french wine and Belgian chocolates. I'm sure I will have lots of friends on Monday.

Rivet

2007-02-28T20:18:00.000Z

We had a duckling with four legs last week but this is ridiculous.

How did they catch the little bastard anyway ?

Any ideas for a name for my new pet?

And no jokes about the frog saying "Well Doc, it started as boil on my arse"

Strange Places to Blog

2007-02-27T20:19:00.000Z

O.K. it took me longer than 15 minutes to sort the piccies, but I had my instructions from The Bro so I wouldn't forget how to do it, and I need to practice just in case I get time to snap a few shots of Belgium next week. I am supposed to be working after all.

So I failed the 15 minute time limit but it is a strange place.

This is my refuge from the stresses and strains of work and the pressures of being a Deity.

I need my toys. The fishing gear is in the shed, there's no room for it all in here.

Next challenge, world peace and creating a link.

Funny shaped balls

2007-02-25T11:00:00.000Z

First of all, well done to GG, Sassy and Lynn for knowing the formula which explains how "Beer goggles" work.
Also to Dive for a great Bill Bryson job on Ame & Bear and their trip to our green and pleasant land. (except for the twat who made off with Ames bag), we can only apologise for certain elements of the population and hope it didn't spoil their trip too much.

As for the funny shaped balls, yesterday was not the best for me. My beloved Tigers, (Leicester rugby club), lost to Northampton, our local rivals from down the road, thus ending a 33 game un-beaten run at Welford road (our home ground). We are top of the league and playing well, they are one place off the bottom and struggling, so we stood no chance. Last good run we had was un-beaten at home for over 50 games, which was ended in 2002 by, you guessed it, bloody Northampton. C'est la vie. Fair play to them, and with any luck it will give us a boost for the rest of the season. I just booked tickets for the Premiership final at Twickenham in May so we had better get there.

England fared no better at Croke Park with a worthy and record breaking Irish victory by 43 points to 13. Bugger, that will cost me a quid and 10 minutes of ritual humiliation on Monday from my Irish mate. At least the Sweaties and the Welsh also lost. Apologies to old K if he reads this.

I was looking forward to this weekends rugby fest as I have spent the last few weeks working late and trying to turn sows ears into show cars fit for the Geneva Motor Show. I love tight deadlines but this was as close as I want to get. We got finished Saturday lunchtime so I also missed my early breakfast at the coffee shop with Dive. Can't post any piccies yet cos it's confidential until press day but will try to do something for petrol heads in a couple of weeks and put up some pics of some of my babies from the last couple of years.

I'm off to Belgium next Monday for a week of wonderful test work on new paint systems and technologies. What a life I lead. I hope I get my reward and manage to blag a trip to Japan or Bushville later this year to "help the dealer network to keep our cars nice and shiny for the customers"!
Belgium is o.k as we usually manage to get to Brussels and Antwerp for a few beers during the week and the restaurants are really good over there so I get the opportunity to eat unusual stuff again. Had curry ice cream, frogs legs and bison last time, although not all on the same plate. They also get through a lot of horses milk !!!! maybe I'll give it a go...... or maybe nay.
There is a carrot museum in Belgium so I will try to find out where that is and I will try get some piccies of the stunning architecture in the main squares in both cities.
Can't promise to be up to the standards set by some people but there are touchy, feeley, rubby brass plaques and Le Mannequin Pisse, who has different costumes depending on the time of year. He was once dressed as Elvis with the white jump suit and rhinestones, honest!!

Ja manekes. God bless the phlegm's.

Another of life's mysteries solved

2007-02-18T18:45:00.000Z

It's official, this is why you usually wake up with a minger after a heavy night out on the pull.

10 Q.I points for the first person to work it out.

KEY TO FORMULA

An = number of units of alcohol consumed
S = smokiness of the room (graded from 0-10, where 0 clear air; 10 extremely smoky)
L = luminance of 'person of interest' (candelas per square metre; typically 1 pitch black; 150 as seen in normal room lighting)
Vo = Snellen visual acuity (6/6 normal; 6/12 just meets driving standard)
d = distance from 'person of interest' (metres; 0.5 to 3 metres)

No worries mate

2007-02-16T16:03:00.000Z

Just listened to an interview on the BBC news website.

Headline is "Drunk Aussie attacks a shark"

It's really funny, check it out if you can.
He was down by the jetty and after "a few drinks followed by another few drinks". There were people trying to catch some squid but a bronze whaler shark was hanging around and messing with their floats.
He then got some guys to lure the shark into shallower water, stripped off his strides and got into the sea.
"I climbed down a ladder and moved towards the shallows until I could touch the bottom. I got to titty height then made a lunge and grabbed him by the tail"
He then managed to get back to the ladder, haul up the shark and toss it into the crowd of fishermen and on-lookers.
"They're good eatin so I asked if anyone had a knife so I could kill it and bleed it, this one bloke gave me a knife the size of half a match................" and so on until the radio interviewer said he had run out of time and had to end the show.

Shades of "That's amazing" with Carl Hooper. Fast Show fans should remember.

OINK

2007-02-15T21:02:00.000Z

Snuffle, snort, snort, oink, blimey...........a truffle !!

Happy Year of the Pig to one and all.

Ouch!!!

2007-02-10T19:56:00.000Z

So, the snow has all gone here in Norfolk, and although we got off quite lightly over here I cannot help but think back to the winters from my childhood.
Those of you who follow Dives blog will have seen what that was like, and how nasty he was as a child. I always seemed to be on the wrong end of the snowballs.
It was thick snow from November to the end of Feb most years, or so it seemed, and the Country didn't grind to a halt. We walked to school, as usual, and if the heating didn't work, we kept our coats on and ran around a lot. Isn't progress wonderful.

(2 snowmen were having a chat, one said to the other, "can you smell carrots")?

Off to the City for breakfast with the Bro through a strange mix of weather from bright and cloudy to heavy sleety rain, mist, that fine rain that soaks you through (thank you Peter Kay) and back to bright and cloudy again, all in 10 miles.
Managed not to buy any musical instruments today, although there was a very nice acoustic guitar in the shop into which I was dragged in a futile attempt to locate some "treble clef" earrings, a gift which Dive wanted for a friend. (We did try P).

Got home and spent the next two and a half hours finding out what 15 years of not playing guitar means to my fingertips. Thanks Bro, that really hurts but I do have the first part of "Big black cow" almost sorted.

England beat Italy today, not a wonderful performance but a win is a win, and I'm sure that nice Mr Knudsen will be celebrating Scotland's victory over Wales. (shame for the Welsh.... he he, pass that wooden spoon please, we may be needing that in Cardiff in a few weeks time).

Anyway, must go, as I have a glass of good rioja in hand and a drum kit which is saying "play me now, play me now"

At least it will give my fingertips a break.

Horse's arse

2007-02-07T19:14:00.000Z

I can't believe how long it's been since I was last here. No excuse really, apart from the Deity stuff, being really busy at work, getting pissed off with the England rugby performances, getting drunk during the festival of Bah Humbug, otherwise known as Christmas, sampling the excellent beer from the new brewery which a friend has just opened, playing my drums and letting my big brother convince me that I really really needed to buy a new guitar to sit on the stand which is all I originally intended to buy. Oh, and I forgot my log in and password, again!
Anyway, I also succumbed and bought a mobile phone, one of the things I have managed to resist for so long as I hate them with a passion. It has a very good camera which is the main reason for getting it so if I can get Big Bro to show me how to put pictures on here, there will be no stopping me.

Nothing really

2006-11-20T20:39:00.000Z

Blimey, it has been a while since I was last here.
Lots of stuff going on at work over the last 3 weeks, which means we are now finished with the latest round of redundancies. Not nice, so I will not dwell on it.

Anyway, besides that, what else has happened recently?

England lost to Argentina and the Springboks handed us the game last Saturday. Thanks chaps, I'm sure Andy Robinson was very grateful. He still needs to be replaced at the end of the Autumn games.

Good old GW lost lots of seats in both houses but managed to convince himself that this was always in his plans, we believe you George, if it helps to consolify you.

Christmas is here already. I'm afraid I am with Dive on this subject, baah humbug.
It was just too much on Saturday morning in the coffee shop having to listen to carols.
IT'S THE MIDDLE OF NOVEMBER FOR FUCKS SAKE.

The ashes series starts this week down under. Not too sure how that will go but I am off for a couple of days at the end of this week so I think it would be rude not to stay up very late and watch the first days play.

Lots of other stuff went on all over the place since my last post but, if I told you about all that, you wouldn't need to buy a paper.
I will content myself with the fact that it has been so long since I last wrote something that I forgot my password, so I won't leave it so long next time, ("what a silly bunt").

Shiiiiite

2006-11-07T19:58:00.000Z

It was a very good day on Sunday.

I have known my mate Colin for almost 20 years, we have been through all kinds of stuff over that time and we both share a passion for the Union game. (Played by men with funny shaped balls).
Now I am sure egg chasing isn't for everyone but ever since young William Webb Ellis picked up the ball at Rugby school, the game has been played and supported by people who know how to appreciate sport and sportsmanship.
With this in mind, we were really looking forward to being at H.Q. (Twickenham) for the 2 biggest occasions of this year.

The opening of the new South stand, and England v New Zealand.

Twickenham stadium, being where it is, requires us to leave home allowing 6 hours to get to the ground.
It only takes 3 hours to get to the A316 at Staines but the 5 or so miles from there to the stadium can take another 2 hours, as we found out in 2004 when we got into the South Africa game with 5 minutes to kick-off.
We were in good time on Sunday and so we strolled over to the Guinness trailer, obtained a couple of pints of the good stuff and "did the car park"
It is a tradition at Twickenham, in the grounds behind the west stand, that a car park and general mingling area " The Village" is created. Club members and rugby gentlefolk gather with their Range Rovers and the like, with picnic hampers and folding chairs and all manner of fine things to eat and drink, to take in the atmosphere and socialise before the game.
Can't see that happening at Anfield or Old Trafford somehow!

Anyway, the new south stand just needs the roof putting on, but is complete in all other respects. The stadium now holds 82,500 ish, and we all boo'ed the right awful Tessa Jowell, MP for Culture, media and sport (yeah right), when she "opened" it. They did cut the sound of our displeasure out when it was shown on T.V. so I'm told.

So that was fun, then came The All Blacks.

I never expected England to win this game but to lose by a record margin was testament to the piss poor job being done by Andy Robinson as director of rugby.
Why sack most of the coaches but keep the guy who gave them the (mis) direction which lead to the six consecutive defeats we have now suffered.
I'm sure Rob Andrew will do something about this at some stage, but as far as this rant is concerned, we can forget the next 3 tests against Argentina and the Springboks, The Six Nations and next years World Cup because without new ideas and passion, we will be chasing the southern hemisphere again just like we always did.

I still shouted and sang for my Country as I always do, but we were also playing against a French referee and TMO (third match official) and 2 Aussie touch judges.
1 perfectly good try disallowed and some very dubious calls on the right hand touch line were enough to make me think we would not get too close by the end of the game, but 20 - 41 was a bit much.
My only disappointment was not seeing the best team in the World playing in the way for which they are famous. i.e fast, free flowing, running rugby.
Dan Carter is the best fly half in the World but surely he could run the ball or kick to touch from all the penalties England gave away rather than kicking for goal. I know he only missed 1 but that's not the point.

Anyway, we got stuffed, had a great day out, and got home in time for Colin's better half to supply us with a hearty meal and send us down the pub to console ourselves, so in all, it was a good day.

Looking forward to tomorrow and finding out what happened in the Mid Terms. Still with less than half the American voters actually exercising their only chance to make a difference, I suppose old George will still have some seats left to controlify the Country.

Long live democracy.

Hey hey U.S.A.

2006-11-03T15:21:00.000Z

One of the most frustrating things about being a Supreme Entity on a part-time basis is that you don't get the options available to the full-time Deity.
These include "flood, famine, plague, mud & devastation, boils, looking like a dick-head etc" buttons on the remote control, along with thunderbolts and all the good stuff.

If these were at my disposal, I'm sure the cabbage in The White House would have been on the receiving end way before now.
Problem is, his "fellow Americans" seem only too eager to keep voting him back into office regardless of the fact that they are now unable to safely leave their own shores without fear of persecution, and the biggest return on U.S. foreign policy seems to be in full body bags since George jr got to re-start Daddy's war.
In 2004 George won a comfortable victory by 52% to Kerry's 48%. I suppose to someone who obviously can't count beyond 23 by using all his attributes, this seems comfortable. Not from this side of the water.
We also suffer from the fact that our glorious leader Mr Blur is so far up GWB jr's arse that the only thing making Georges eyes seem bright is the glare from Tony's teeth.

My feelings for our European colleagues may be less than loving, (notably the French rugby team) but we are closer to them than we are to America, so our nations direction should be driven by the best interests of Britain rather than some un-holy alliance between someone who's Daddy bought him a Presidency because he was no bloody good at anything else, and a Thunderbird puppet who took office by re-naming old Tory policy as "New Labour" and smiling a lot.

Perhaps we should take our lead from history.
On this day in 1957 the Russians launched the first dog into space, so with me being The Monkey God and George being nearer to monkey's than homo sapiens, maybe I should use my simian influence and persuade him to test the next N.A.S.A. mission to crash into Uranus. Tony could navigate for him.

Sorry for the rant but isn't that what this is all about?

I never used to be an opinionated old scroat, I think I am turning into my Brother.

By the way, for anyone who gives a shit, the double glazing quote was interesting.
6 windows, 1 front door and 2 french doors, 13 grand !!!!!!!!! which could be eased down to 7.5 k.
I showed him my 3 wood and said I could ease this somewhere, then I showed him the current front door and demonstrated how it works.
I will speak to Wendy from next door and get a quote from the guy's who supplied her windows.

Here we go 2, 3, 4.

2006-11-01T14:02:00.000Z

Right then, here we are all blogged up with the afternoon off, waiting for the double glazing guy to come round and "give me a price" for my windows and doors.
This should be a laugh. I invited one of these types into my home about 10 years ago, and after 4 hours of "have you considered" and "of course this makes you eligible for a 400% discount if you fit this on the 5th Wednesday in February when the mist is on the swonickles" My soul left my body and buggered off down the pub without me.
Old Dive was banging on about Jehovah's witnesses, evangelists et al. They have nothing on this crowd, but needs must when the north wind blows and you are too tight to put the heating on while you can still feel your fingers.
By the way, my best advice for the God botherers is just to say " thanks but I am a Jedi Knight" and shut the door while smiling. A "give blood" sticker next to the doorbell can also keep certain persuasions at bay.

Anyway, I was intending to elaborate a little about me and what I do when I get time off from the Simian Deity duties.
I don't feel middle aged but am not too sure if 45 fits in that category. My job keeps me young ha ha.
Senior process engineer for body and paint is my official title but "you there" or "Can you just" also fit the bill.
I work for a company with a huge history in motor sport and a world renowned reputation for creating cars with un-paralleled ride & handling. We are in Norfolk so no prizes for guessing, and no negative comments about lots of trouble, usually serious. I am very proud of where I work and our history and I get very defensive about it. (Old Git Syndrome I suppose).
I am involved in everything which concerns body structures and coatings within manufacturing, which can be much more interesting than it sounds.
It has taken me to lots of nice places around the world, and I get to play with all the future projects and latest composites and paint systems. I also have a couple of small specialist departments to run within the paint shop.
I love my job but it can be a pain in the arse at times.

O.K. I have finished with the work thing for now, you can all wake up.

I am also a big rugby union fan. I have followed Leicester Tigers for more years than I choose to remember and I get to games when I can, but as Welford Road (home ground) is always sold out weeks in advance and is also a 3 hour drive from my home, it is not very easy.
I am off to Twickenham on Sunday to watch England take on the All Blacks. Beating them will be a big challenge but I'm sure it will be a cracking game whatever the result.

Is that the doorbell I hear? Quick, where is my light sabre and severed goats head just in case?

I think I hear the sacred "20mm air gap" chant of the double glazing guild, let's see what happens..........

Hello World, Hello Trees

2006-10-28T11:07:00.000+01:00

I've been hanging around up here all these years.
Now the trees have grown high enough to reach me, I've invented climbing down.
Now I'm walking upright, so watch it!